shoes for amanda's wedding

i'm the maid of honor (whew, escaped matron narrowly!) in amanda's wedding. the dresses we're wearing are aqua and we were tasked with red shoes which i finally found today. :) those are red leather platform slingbacks by GUESS on sale for $39.99. sah-weet!

i'm going through a pissed off phase again about bk's lack of participation, level of partying and general disinterest in anything pertaining to the kids. he spends about 4 hours a week with the kids and has been canceling frequently even on that little bit of time. he's apparently seeing a young (quite) woman with a 2 year old and i suspect he sees that kid more. dear LORD. just get out already. admit you don't give a shit and move away or something. more tomorrow.

tattoo

he's inked their names
on his upper back
in a flashy sort of font.

as if carrying them like this
makes up for all the ways
he has let them down.

my desire to claw them
off of you is tempered by
the knowledge that you
never really held them,

by the finger-printy card our
son made at school, already
promised to someone else,

how our daughter will perform,

the whole world in her hands,

not noticing the place you aren't.

overdue

i have the sleepy sickenss again. will not backspace which you know if very hard. flowers wildting in two vases to say i'm a mom, by chouice, good or not, thanks for all you do! theres a choice asshat? takethe bed, the sidetables the mattress...the milk stains, teh baby pee, the sexless night. have it, enhoy it's yours! its the proverbial: you made your bed, now sleep in it! not quite right i'm sure but hazah. the promise of a trip a vacation a plane you and me. funny we haven't vacationed together are you a beach sleeper a hesitant turtle snorkler a persistant drinker? don't want to hear about the day the wedding the boxes but the three housr the 72 cups of coffee the avocados just ripe and the not-s0-baby asking for beets for breakfast. roasted as instructed. one in africa, maybe two can't remember the date but fairly certain you warned of danger on the beach for women we have a california king now you don't feel so far away or in any case i'm too comfortable to give a hot damn. we're buried in chocolate gobs and gobs in the new machine that felt so far away in fact the bed is calling now.

a passing

a friend of our family passed away rather unexpectedly in thailand.

r.i.p. lonny 1942-2010 so many wonderful memories of sol-duc!

another night at the kitchen

music may?

to be followed by a free write, eh?

because i said so, bitches!